My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
