So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize