Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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