saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
