Will you blow on my dice?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
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