kristin has been a bad kristin
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
