I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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