I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
