He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
