So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
