so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
