Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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