I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
The air was thick with penises
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
