i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
