You smell like a Billy Joel song
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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