i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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