I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
