After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
