Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
