no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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