Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
