ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
