Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Randomize
