Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
