i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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