can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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