I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize