i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I just found a bag of teeth...
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
