Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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