i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
