I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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