i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
