No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize