New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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