seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
