i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
