Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Randomize
