dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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