I need help removing her.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
