I can't watch pbs sober anymore
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
Randomize
