take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
