I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
