So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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