I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
