out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
As shirtless as possible
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
