Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
