carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
