so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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