May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
