I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
